Maybe May

For the love of shopping


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Disarm

Disarm

 

Disarm you with a smile
And cut you like you want me to
Cut that little child
Inside of me and such a part of you
Ooh, the years burn

I used to be a little boy
So old in my shoes
And what I choose is my choice
What’s a boy supposed to do?
The killer in me is the killer in you
My love, I send this smile over to you

Disarm you with a smile
And leave you like they left me here
To wither in denial
The bitterness of one who’s left alone
Ooh, the years burn
Ooh, the years burn, burn, burn

 

 

Credits:

Pose: an lar [poses] Like a Lady Two

Dress: [AUX]Long T-Shirt Dress – Black

Jacket: (Milk Motion) cosmic bomber – black stars (most recent round of C88)

Stockings: *League* Side-Gartered Stockings -Black

Boots: [Gos] Triumph Boots V2 in Red – Fem  (with [Gos] FEMALE Triumph Polish)

Hair: Lamb – Blue Velvet – Twix

Skin: PF- Harley

 


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Disaster

Conflict

 

Disaster

Your hands to my hips cause aches,

Your tongue to my lips, ruin,

Your skin against mine, death.

The problem is, even in your absence

I am at war with myself, with you, with life.

I am a fucked up beautiful thing that will destroy you

Even if I don’t want too, even if I try desperately not too.

I, I am a disaster always happening.

 

Credits:

Chair: Kuro – Lodge Armchair – Red

Top: [Deadwool] Gingham shirt  (female) – pale pink

Pants: coldLogic jeggings – seyfried.black

Boots: Maitreya Stagioni Boots

Hair – Lamb – Blue velvet

Glasses – Sleepy Eddy – Boston

Skin – PF Harley

Nails – {Wicked} Peach – GLITTER! (I am ALWAYS wearing wicked peach nails, ALWAYS!)

 


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I’ll Lose Myself In A Fairy Tale

Lose Myself

Fall is quickly approaching, unless your live in my imagination in which case it’s already here and colors abound!

I am so excited to enter the season with these little guys from Mish Mish, you can find their friend at the Arcade

which opens tomorrow! They are so sweet, little Rocky here knew that my fall was going to be quite lonely so

he pulled out a magical book chocked-full of fairy tales to read to me. And this gal nestled in my hair is

Willow, shes loves to snuggle almost as much as I do!  Perhaps I won’t be so lonely as I thought this autumn.

Credits:

*MishMish* Chipmunk’s House – RARE (The Arcade)

*MishMish* Chipmunk – Reading a story(The Arcade)

*MishMish* Chipmunk – Attachment(The Arcade)

Tee*fy Olga  Sweatshirt Dress  Peach

POST: Toimi Pole Shed (v1)

Tee*fy  Cloud Layers Leggings

fri. – Cotton.Mary Janes (Kitten)

Zigana – autumn leafy

Botanical – T2C Linden Small [t] 4

PILOT – Water Hose

[PF] Harley <Peach>

!lamb. Blue Velvet (Mesh) – Chocolate Bars Pack

:Z.S: Simple nose rings Left


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Fire Starter

Fire Starter

Lost now are the days of peace keeping magic, a fire has been kindled within me, the tender lit by the tip of your arrow.

A blood lust rises inside me, pours out of me, and stains my cheeks.

Anger, hate, rage, all the things I fought so long to protect this world from now consume my every thought…

…I am lost.

Credits:

Robe:  FATEplay – Ithron – Fire (I could live in all the FATEplay clothes!)

Hair: !lamb. Thieves Like Us (Mesh) – Chocolate Bars Pack

Tattoo Layers: Corvus : Tired Eyes Makeup – Beat to Shit Tattoo (no clue where its from) – REPULSE – Bloody Tears III Face Tattoo- (I would just like to note there is A LOT of post processing so… yeah.)

Eye- Ok these are my normal IKON eyes, again heavily post processed so they don’t even remotely look like the photo.

Skin: Glam Affain – Lulu

Broken Tower Thingy: Botanical – Forest Ruins Tower


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Sister, you’ve been on my mind

Sister

 

Some times songs just say it better than I ever could…

Sister, you’ve been on my mind
Sister, we’re two of a kind
So, sister, I’m keepin’ my eye on you.

I betcha think I don’t know nothin’
But singin’ the blues, oh, sister,
Have I got news for you, I’m something,
I hope you think that you’re something too

Scufflin’, I been up that lonesome road
And I seen alot of suns going down
Oh, but trust me,
No-o low life’s gonna run me around.

So let me tell you something Sister,
Remember your name, No twister
Gonna steal your stuff away, my sister,
We sho’ ain’t got a whole lot of time,
So-o-o shake your shimmy Sister,
‘Cause honey the ‘shug’ is feelin’ fine.

 

Credits:

Autumn is Wearing :

Hair: “”D!va”” Hair “Layla” (Type A)(Brown diamond)
Shoes: Ingenue :: Pickford Heels :: Plum
Dress: ISON – dazzle gown (plum)
Hands: Slink Mesh Hands (av) Elegant1
Jewerly: [HANDverk]Zelda – violet
Skin: [PF] Harley <Peach>

 

I am Wearing :
Hair: !lamb. Zelda (Mesh) – Chocolate Bars Pack
Dress: ISON – dazzle gown (emerald)
Necklace: **DECO – MESH Marilyn Pearls (smoke)**
Awesome Piano: Alouette – Evelyn Piano – Worn Brown Wood
Poses: Pose: .::Kirin Poses::. Burlesque Poses

 


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Pandora’s box

Pandoras Box

You have to get a little rough if you want to get inside Pandora’s box.

P.S. My mind has been wondering, trying to find a balance, the place where I dwelled before. Some days there’s too much reality and other too much fantasy, with quick glimpses of where and what I used to be.

Credits:

Dress: (fd) Babydoll Tank – Floral Forest -C88

Skin: Glam Affair – Lulu 07 – The Arcade

Stockings: erratic / ripped stockings

Necklaces: MG – Necklace – Peace Rocker

Black Undershirt: :::Sn@tch Inara Off Work::

Hair: !lamb. Blue Velvet (Mesh) – Chocolate Bars Pack

Eyeshadow: -Sorry.Asia- Smokey Eyes

Knee Bandages: -SU!- Bloody Knees 03

Skybox: [AF] PARIS Apartment


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I’m Tired

I'm Tired

The past two months for me have been exhausting, I shouldn’t be this tired at 28 years old. I should be out being social and happy and shiny and bright, but instead I am sitting at home planning another doctors visit, and wondering what blood tests they will have in store for me. I am luckier than most, my diseases don’t make me hurt, and for that I am grateful, and I just have to keep reminding myself of that. I just have auto-immune diseases, my body is trying to destroy my thyroid, and I have celiacs disease, and apparently now it’s trying to destroy my cells that create insulin for my body. I have blood tests almost every week, and I had an MRI done yesterday which proved to be added stress I didn’t actually need because it only revealed a microadenoma on my pituitary gland that they weren’t sure if it was really a microadenoma or just cell cell debris because it was so damn small, but because they are doctors they err on the side of caution and so I will have another MRI in 6 months to a year. Why am I telling you all this? Because I need to get it out, I need to bitch and moan and be weak for just one day, I need to not be ok with everything that’s happening for a minute  and I need to feel sad because I am so tired of being wonder woman and going through my every day trying to do it all with a smile. I hate that any of this is happening, I hate that I had to give up all my favorite foods, and sugar, and I am so fucking tired of salads I could scream. I just want to be healthy, I want to stop feeling guilty because I feel like I am robbing my husband of a chance to have a happy healthy wife, I want to be the healthy daughter my parents hoped for, I want to be the friend who isn’t always tired and sad on the inside. I want to remember what its like going through an entire day with out having something to cry about. Today I am not ok, and I am not sorry for that, because tomorrow I will be fine again, but today is my day too feel sorry for myself and to feel angry that I am sick, and to be tired of being tired.

Credits:

My comfy sofa bed that makes me feel slightly better: L&K – Spring evening sofa bed (PG) – Available at The Designers Warehouse 

Accent Chair: Zigana -Cupped chair . tulip – FLF

Chalk Board: {vespertine- daily chalkboard/ today version} FLF

Lamp: [*Art Dummy!] vain. (lamp)

Clothes: Top – Mon Tissu – Bottoms – Maitreya

Hair: Lamb- Blue Velvet

House: The Domineaux Effect – The Old Orchard Cottage (resizeable)


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Witch Fire

Witch Fire

 

Sometimes pictures just speak for themselves, and it’s hard to find the words to to accentuate them, this is ones of those times lol. I am just absolutely in love with so many things from the Fantasy fair and this photo features a beautifully crafted dress from Bilo and the a stunning Royal Room Skybox from 22769 both available at the fantasy fair!!


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I’m Not Ready To Heal…

This week the 50 Shades challenge was more than challenging for me, I just plain wasn’t gonna do it cause for what ever reason my brain rejected the theme of “Sexual Healing”. Usually I don’t think much of it when I can’t get inspiration but when it sent me into crying fits because I couldn’t seem to make it happen I knew something was actually really wrong, because really, who would cry over something like this? I took a deep introspective look inside, and realized some things I maybe haven’t really gotten past and decided that I don’t think I’m ready to heal yet.

I'm Not Ready To Heal

Credits:

Bra – Blah. (My Petit Amour Lingerie / Fearless Heart) Set
Bow – (Milk Motion) My huge bow headband
Skin – :GP: Petal Frex [Light] Party Girl-Midnight 1
Hair – !lamb. Adore (Mesh) – Ink
Tattoo Sleeves: ::Para Designs:: Retro Color Medium
Eyes: Mayfly – Liquid Light Eyes (Sea Green)

Behind me are the cute cubby steps that Floorplan made… I love floorplan.