Your arms encircle me, ensnare me like a storming sea, your hands like the waves grab at me, wearing away my stone like resolve to not let this happen. I hate it, I want it, I hate that I want it and I try to resist it, but you are a typhoon whose course is set crash into me and unearth my planted feet, tearing me away from reality and thrusting me into this other-worldliness where nothing exist but you and I… you… and I…
“Riffraff, street rat I don’t buy that If only they’d look closer Would they see a poor boy? No, siree They’d find out There’s so much more to me”
Pardon me while I have a rant blog today, it will probably make no sense, and change direction on a dime.
I think there are a lot of circumstances in my life that cause me to feel like people to look at me like a pariah, like I am something less than. I’m not perfect in any way, I’m not a classic beauty, I’m not the picture of perfect health, I’m not the most successful person in the world, hell, I even miss laundry day some times… I mean there are so many things that I don’t do right, I even let myself down a lot. But what really hurts is that in my real life, other than my immediate household, people don’t see ME, people don’t give me the time of day. Hearing someone whisper to another “Shes an odd one” makes me want to scream at them that I am actually kind of amazing, I would -despite their rudeness- give them the shirt off my back if they needed it, even to my own detriment, I would give my last breathe to a friend if it meant they could live, I love deeper and harder than should humanly be allowed. And yet some how, this has made me “Odd”, being some one who wants nothing more than for everyones life to be filled with beauty and love. People are so quick to judge because they see ONE thing they don’t like and they let that ONE thing define an entire being. How can they not see that we are so much more, that if they only took the time to sit and talk they would find a bit of themselves in us.
I may not be perfect, I may have a lot of chips and cracks, but I am worth a deeper look, I am worth loving.
Outfit: .:Wimey:. Captive Princess (Royal Purple) @ The Fantasy Collective
Shoes: fri. – Lizzie.Slippers (Red) @ The Seraphim Social
Change is never easy, particularly when it involves overcoming certain emotions, and dealing with things you never thought you would have to.
I some times think I place my heart in hands that are to shaky to hold it with out dropping it, and more often than not I pick it up and let them hold it again, until it just hurts to much, until what I pick up no longer resembles a heart from all the bruises, scares, and broken off bits.
I then steal away to a dark place where I brood, and cry, and wallow in my hurt, blaming everyone else for my hurt but me, the one who handed out their heart in the first place, they may have dropped it, but I kept giving it to them. Why do I do that?
Furniture: Cheeky Pea :CP: Ansel Living Room set from C88
This shirt was just to awesome not to blog, like, the moment I saw it at faMESHed I was like YES! And yeah I know, I usually write poems to go along with my posts but this just inspired pure rock and head banging which is it’s own kind of pottery so today I will just let AC ϟ DC do the talking for me!
Please please please click for full view
Awesome shirt: Emery – Mesh Top Metal Grey (faMESHed)